Thursday, June 17, 2010

Life is a Party at the Doctors Office....



Believing is never seeing
I believe I am well, I believe I am fine
I know God is with me, never far behind

Loving is always feeling
Feeling happy, feeling mad
Having even more, when times are so bad

Laughing is always making fun
Fun at the doctors, smile through the pain
Laughing is the cure for so many things

Crying is so healing
Feel it pouring out, like rain from the sky
When you're crying, it's impossible to tell a lie

The truth, we have no choice
Sneaks up when you expect it the least
Tells us a sad story so very often
The truth, may it always bring you peace

Feeling kind of sad today, so I thought writing might make me feel better. I'm ready...I am so ready for this to be over and done with! My body is getting weaker with every treatment and I just want it back! I'm sitting here in bed and barely have the energy to write but I know I'll sleep better if I talk a little and get some of this off my mind. The days are so long for me now. I find myself counting down the hours until I can go to bed again. Only because everyday that passes is one day closer to being done and being HEALED! I am constantly trying to receive my healing and believe that it is coming. It's tough. Especially with the fact that I have a PET scan tomorrow to see how much progress I've made. I have this fear that I'm going to have to have more chemo than we thought or that for some reason my body didn't respond to the chemo as well as it should have. I feel like if they tell me I have to have 6 treatments instead of 4 I will have a very tough time accepting that. As it is right now, I feel like this 4th treatment will push me past any limit I've ever had. I just have to believe that the PET scan will come back showing that the chemo has been working. It just has to.

6 comments:

  1. Sienna,
    I know your going through so much. You are strong and I am proud to call you sister. I love you. I'm going to call you tomorrow.
    Yes, it just has to.

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  2. You're so positive! It's easy for me to say but you're almost done. I love you and I know you'll make it through.
    and I love that picture!

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  3. I loved your poem so much I read it again . Beautiful.

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  4. I love your blog Sienna, it is so open and honest and I admire you for doing it. I think of you often and hope that treatments are working well and that you are almost done. I want you to feel your best so that you can enjoy every second with Presley!

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  5. Prayers to you always....you have so much strength.....I am just in awh of you. Love and hugs always.

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  6. Life is just one day at a time. You are doing great!
    Love
    Sharla

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